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Nextaholics Anonymous
Posted by: Barely Anonymous Ben T (
Date: September 04, 2002 08:38PM

<HTML>It seems to me there is a need for some kind of support group for people addicted to the Nextian World (there is probably also a deep need for psychiatric reports on Ben and Bea, but thats a different issue)

Thus I would like to declare this thread the Nextaholic Anonymous thread, where people can confess their addiction to the Nextian world and their attempts to lead others astray (*looks at Bea accusingly but fondly*) into the world of Next.</HTML>

Re: Nextaholics Anonymous
Posted by: ben t (
Date: September 04, 2002 08:44PM

<HTML>'Spose I ought to go first:

Hi, I'm ben t, and I'm a nextaholic.

I didn't mean to pick up LIAGB, but that mammoth looked so cute. Once I started to read, I sank deeper, until I couldn't turn the light off anymore - I had to read until the next chapter. But I couldn't stop at one. I had to read them all, I had to buy EA. My craving was so intense that they found me naked outside the shop at six in the morning with only a book token to cover my nakedness.

Then my nexting became destructive. I had to be logged into the Fforde Fforum all day, and I colonised other people's threads with my own rubbish. I will get better, I have to keep myself alive. I won't let it remove my will to live 'cause, after all, the 'Well of Lost Plots' is out in 10 months or so...

btw Why, if it's anonymous is the first thing everybody says is 'My name's....' ?</HTML>

Re: Nextaholics Anonymous
Posted by: dave (
Date: September 04, 2002 09:33PM

<HTML>Hi, my name is Dave, and I'm a nextaholic.

a netaholic too, but that's a whole other thread.

My addiction is such that I carry with me at all times an entropy verification device. I have them in a variety of colours to co-ordinate with whatever I'm wearing.

I take them out in public. I'm not ashamed.</HTML>

Re: Nextaholics Anonymous
Posted by: all_american_cutie (
Date: September 05, 2002 05:42AM

<HTML>Hi, my name is Twila, and <sigh> I'm a Nextaholic.

It started with an innocent suggestion from Amazon or Barnes and Noble based on all my other classic literature purchases. (Jane Austen, the Bronte sisters, etc)

Oh how I rue the day that "The Eyre Affair" arrived. I took it to bed that night and read until dawn. I finished it at about 8am. Thankfully, I don't work outside our home, so I was able to sleep after that. But since then, my sleep schedule has been greatly awry. I've never quite gotten back into the proper circadian rhythm!

Then I re-read the book and became a pusher. People on airplanes and in airports asked me why I was laughing out loud. So of course I had to tell them. Then I bought it for some friends. I recommend it to everyone who says they like to read...even to those who don't. I keep trying to talk my husband into reading it, but when I attempt to explain the plot, he just shakes his head and tells me I'm crazy.

I think my addiction peaked when I got a signed copy of "Lost In A Good Book". I became obsessed (and still am) and I have been searching for a UK signed version of "TEA". As an American, I was unable to find a "LIAGB" here yet, so I had to buy it from a British dealer so I didn't have to wait another 6 months. I'm still searching for a reasonably priced excellent copy of "TEA" by the if anyone knows of one, let me know!

I'm so addicted that I even bought one of my other junkie friends a paperback version of "LIAGB" and mailed it as a surprise. And a funny thing is that she called me the day after I mailed it to lament the wait for the US version to come out so she could read it. She called me again the second she opened the package. Then she noticed the post date. It was just serendipitous! (I even bought myself UK paperback versions of both books so I can save my first edition US version of "TEA" and my signed first edition UK "LIAGB". You can't buy paperback versions of either book in the US!

By the way, that junkie friend has, in turn, recruited a bunch more junkies herself. She said she gives them as gifts to anyone who has a birthday or special event! LOL So I wouldn't be surprised to see her log in as a Nextaholic!

As far as addictions go, I guess it could be worse. At least there are no lasting effects of this one. Except maybe becoming even more pale than usual from staying inside to read or play in the Fforde Fforum.


Re: Nextaholics Anonymous
Posted by: ScarletBea (148.177.129.---)
Date: September 05, 2002 09:30AM

<HTML>Hi, I'm Bea and I'm a Nextaholic.

I still haven't build my endoscope, but I can't stay away from the fforum and keep dropping nextian references in my conversations...
I don't buy books for my friends because they don't read in english, and also because I'm always jealous of things i love too much (another addiction?), but I've posted on another forum advertising the books and this fforum...

I have to go to work and I'm still here reading past posts and commenting...

No, no, don't drag me away!!!
*men in white start dragging Bea*
I just want to SHOUT....
*come on girl, you'll be ok*
... I love the people I met here and...
*girl, all the people here are crazy, how can you say that?*
... I don't want to be healed! I want my 'Well of...
*stop it, there won't be anything else, our colleagues are at this moment arresting the initiator of this cult, some Jasper guy*
-- dies --</HTML>

Re: Nextaholics Anonymous
Posted by: charles ronayne (
Date: September 05, 2002 03:51PM

<HTML>Hi my name is Charles and I am a fully fledged Nextaholic. I picked up Lost in a Good Book because it had been brought down in price and it was a signed copy (as is the whim of the cash-strapped student) and I have been hooked ever since. My life reached a new low when I found out that the Well of Lost Plots was not going to be released until next July, but I have concented to make monthly pilgrimages to Swindon to try and cope. Hopefully with the pictures I have found on this sight I can get around. (btw I would really like to get one of Spike Stokers cars if anybody knows where I can get one!!). You see this really is bad, I can't even drive. I hope to go up to the University of Liverpool and find other people who share the passion, or at least to start converting people from GSD to the UFN (United Followers Next.) Thank you guys it is nice to know that I am not alone.
Yours in Addiction
Charles Ronayne</HTML>

Re: Nextaholics Anonymous
Posted by: Lisa Elliott Next (195.224.127.---)
Date: September 05, 2002 03:59PM

<HTML>Oh Dave. I am so glad there is someone out there who does this too. I don't feel so alone (and stupid) now.</HTML>

Re: Nextaholics Anonymous
Posted by: dave (
Date: September 05, 2002 04:07PM

<HTML>It's the only way to be safe, I reckon.

ScarletBea and myself are going into business, doing colour-coordinated entroposcopes. Any colour(s) you like...</HTML>

Re: Nextaholics Anonymous
Posted by: jon brierley (
Date: September 12, 2002 09:50PM

<HTML>Hi, everybody (nervous grin), my names, uh, Jon and....I just like reading good books really, you know, with a proper plot and all....ok, ok! I admit it! I'm (gulp) a Nextaholic.

There; it's said. I feel better already. It all started when I was looking for some holiday reading. I saw the mammoth. I read the blurb. I bought it. Sold my soul for a mere 6.99.....anyway, I forgot to take it on holiday. And while I'm in the hotel reading all the dreck left behind by tasteless tourists, Fforde was eating into my brain. After two weeks of crap The Eyre Affair assumed monstrous proportions in my literature-starved mind.

I got home. Without even putting the cat out I dived into TEA. It was as good as I'd imagined. I was hooked. I read it again. I searched the net for Fforde references. I found his site. And then there was no hope......I was on the hard stuff. Luckily I didn't have too long to wait until LIAGB came out. I devoured it. It was better than the first. I was a wreck, babbling about entroposcopes and Cardenio to anyone who would listen. I even went to Swindon, and even that didn't put me off. I tried to get help, but in order to make anyone understand they had to read the book first, and then of course they were lost themselves....

Curse you, Fforde, what have you done??! How dare you release FUNNY, LITERATE, books into our know we have no LiteraTecs can we be expected to cope, we who are bred to subsist on a diet of soap opera and Hollywood drivel...Goliath will get you in the end you know, oh yes, there is no escape, we're all doomed (wanders off shouting unintelligibly, writing letters to the Daily Mail as he goes)......

(Note; Jon is 42 years old, and can now dress himself without help).</HTML>

Re: Nextaholics Anonymous
Posted by: ScarletBea (148.177.129.---)
Date: September 13, 2002 08:18AM

Seems Jon's got the proper frame of mind to join the crazy threads ;) eh Ben?
Are you there?
You've gone already? NOOOOOOO :(((((
Dave, help me!!!</HTML>

Re: Nextaholics Anonymous
Posted by: Kathryn Ivany (
Date: September 14, 2002 08:51PM


I'm Kathryn and I'm going to be a Nextaholic - as soon as I find a copy of Lost in a Good Book - I'm in Canada - but have been an Anglophile since my English Granny started me on Enid Blyton and Arthur Ransome as a child.

I know I qualify as a Nextaholic - because I'm picking the next book for my book club and they will all have to read the Eyre Affair before the end of next month. Also my ten year old daughter (who has already been introduced to Enid Blyton and Arthur Ransome - although I spared her the Noddy stuff) heard me laughing and spirited the book away to her room as soon as I put it down.

Now I get to explain English Lit to her - WHA HA HA HA - (I love being insideously educational)



Re: Nextaholics Anonymous
Posted by: jon brierley (
Date: September 15, 2002 09:46PM

<HTML>Enid Blyton!

And we think we need help......

(Mind you I liked Arthur Ransome, I still do. I'll grow up one day. But not today....)


Re: Nextaholics Anonymous
Posted by: jon brierley (
Date: September 15, 2002 09:56PM

<HTML>Oh yes...thanks Bea for your do realise that it was all the ravings of a diseased mind, don't you...I'd make myself a better mind, but you can't get the wood, you know.....

(Anyone else who laughed at my post should get help.....real soon)


Re: Nextaholics Anonymous
Posted by: 80% proofscientistdrinker (
Date: September 15, 2002 11:33PM

<HTML>Maybe we should start a new thread - 'Old English children's fiction appreciation society anonymous' ?

Anyone laughing at MY threads shouldn't get any help - they'll only lock you up...

Maybe we should meet up some time and let our handlers/minders/nurses have a good chat?</HTML>

Re: Nextaholics Anonymous
Posted by: Bea (148.177.129.---)
Date: September 16, 2002 08:17AM

I loved Enid Blyton.
The famous 5, the twins, the schools, the adventures...

Ok I know I'm over 30 ;)</HTML>

Re: Nextaholics Anonymous
Posted by: dave (
Date: September 16, 2002 12:29PM

<HTML>Over 30 is the *only* place to be.

Enid Blyton (I'm sure it's an anagram...) is fab. Secret Seven, Famous Five (does anyone remember the tv programme?) etc.

Straw poll: Enid v JK Rowling. Any preferences?</HTML>

Re: Nextaholics Anonymous
Posted by: jon brierley (
Date: September 16, 2002 02:39PM

<HTML>Enid v Jo Rowling eh.....three falls or a submission, doubtless.

Lessee...they both wrote (and I use the past tense advisedly since Ms Rowling seems to have lost the urge can do that to a person) unimaginative formula school stories, BUT, Harry Potter has a few good jokes in it, BUT AGAIN Enid wrote more - so much more. God she wrote a lot. And they were all the same (given the genre - school story/Famous 5/ickle-pretty faiwy story etc). From a child's point of view that isn't all bad; many children need that certainty. Comfort reading.

But I was a swot, and soon realised that Enid wasn't meaty enough for me, and went off and read Ransome, and the Borrowers, and Narnia and Just William and Tolkien and so on and on. As for JKR, I came to her thirty odd years too late, really; aged 10 I would have loved Harry Potter, but age 40 I just thought 'it's a bog-standard school story, ho-hum'.

Verdict; score draw, Enid wins on away goals.

Jon, with lashings of ginger beer</HTML>

Re: Nextaholics Anonymous
Posted by: TriviaKid (
Date: September 16, 2002 02:52PM

<HTML>First round to The Famous Five then. Perhaps we should form a league.

Who's up for round 2?

Ransome v CS Lewis?</HTML>

Re: Nextaholics Anonymous
Posted by: Kathryn Ivany (
Date: September 16, 2002 09:23PM

<HTML>EB got her own TV programme - you Brits have all the good TV.

I'd have to vote for Rowling over Blyton - now because EB is a bit dated and JKR is more special effects now. Nothing can top CS Lewis for me - even Ransome - though I wouldn't necessarily put them in the same genre - I still reread the Narnia series at least once a year.

But we digress from Fforde - and I didn't want to sideline the discussion of his excellent work. I just wanted to express my appreciation of the body of English Literature that has nurtured my reading life - and Fforde reminded me of why I enjoy it so much (the Brontes have been favorites since I read The Return of the Twelve as a child. That book introduced them to me much earlier and with more enthusiasm than ever could have been generated in a senior in high school a.k.a. O-levels).</HTML>

Re: Nextaholics Anonymous
Posted by: jon brierley (
Date: September 17, 2002 03:23PM

<HTML>CS Lewis v Arthur contest! Walkover for Mr Ransome.

I started to say why, but soon realised was writing a dissertation on the subject, so stopped. Long diatribes of other folks point of view v. boring. Which is why I don't like CS Lewis.

Let's end this topic right Kathryn says, let's just appreciate the small miracle that is Mr Fforde, and leave discussion of other works to other places. We can, however, talk about beer as much as we like.


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