I'd say that that man knows his wofe reads the forum and is so being as politic as possible with his answer.

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Blood! Death! War! Rumpy pumpy! Triumph!

First time for everything I suppose!

Ptolemy! PTOLOMEY!

Happy Birthday.

Yes, it is your day today.

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My computer beat me at chess, but I won at kickboxing

*blushes*

Thanks, Skidmarks! It is too! I'm all of 49 now.

I'm hoping to go 2nd hand book shopping later today - there's a fabulous little antiquarian shop on 3 floors in Devizes which I occasionally haunt. The old gentleman who runs it can often be seen around lunchtime with a large glass of red wine on the counter beside him, which always struck me as an extremely civilised way of conducting one's day to day business!

First of all though, CAKES! *hands around slices of sticky chocolate cake to anyone who fancies a piece*

Enjoy the shopping. (The shop owner isn't Dylan Moran, by any chance, is he?)

Happy Birthday! I hope you have all the chocolate cake you can eat and a fabulous year!

Happy Birthday Ptols, to you and the pointy stick.

Pointy stick! Argh! *runs away screaming*

*runs back* Happy birthday. *grabs cake and runs away with mouthful*

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'We're all mad here. I'm mad, you're mad." [said the Cat.]
"How do you know I'm mad?" said Alice.
"You must be," said the Cat, "Or you wouldn't have come here."
- Lewis Carroll, Alice's Adventures In Wonderland

Happy Birthday Ptolly

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Blood! Death! War! Rumpy pumpy! Triumph!

"Maybe a bit too many candles? He's not that old, isn't he?"
"Old enough to hear a word about his smoking habit. That will teach him!"

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Design #3609494995:
It's a newly-discovered breed of fish that keeps your teeth clean, tastes delicious and dissolves in water.
generated with The Prior-Art-O-Matic

Even cartoon characters wont eat the marzipan...

Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday dear NEMADES
Happy birthday to you.

Yes, dear: the cake is for you. Try not to dribble.

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My computer beat me at chess, but I won at kickboxing

Can I have some? Happy unbirthday to everyone but Nem.

__________________________________
'We're all mad here. I'm mad, you're mad." [said the Cat.]
"How do you know I'm mad?" said Alice.
"You must be," said the Cat, "Or you wouldn't have come here."
- Lewis Carroll, Alice's Adventures In Wonderland

Yay! A cake for me? Thank you so much! Cake for everyone! Happy Unbirthday to everyone!
I love birthdays!

Let us welcome pickwick3 to the birthday list.

Unfortunately it is a long wait for cake, so I have stuck some candles into a cottage pie for everyone to enjoy while we wait.

<transfers a few candles to tofu slices, for the vegetarians.>

I had made sure that the candles were not made from animal fat. <sniff>

Just a random thought: if I used a gingerbread cottage for the pie, would it count as sweet or savoury?

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My computer beat me at chess, but I won at kickboxing

Depends if the witch is in (un)savoury

Or out (sweeeeet).

Just so long as you don't drop it on her pretty red slippers (though why she wasn't wearing stilletos like any self-respecting witch, I can't imagine!)

I wrote a story once containing a serious of very bad stretches of word use, but there was a nice tasty description of a delapitated gingerbread cottage.

__________________________________
'We're all mad here. I'm mad, you're mad." [said the Cat.]
"How do you know I'm mad?" said Alice.
"You must be," said the Cat, "Or you wouldn't have come here."
- Lewis Carroll, Alice's Adventures In Wonderland

Ooh, can we see it? Please?