Comes out of closet

admits to liking bagpipes not only due to heritage but the fact they are pitched above hearing range.

admits to liking seeing lassies in tartan kilts/skirts and out of kilts /skirts

remembers old joke about Scottish lady of negotiable affection being 'tartanskirt'

remembers haggis (fried) after long drinking session at London Scottish Rugby (union) Club, along with bacon, eggs, tomatoes, and then a trip across the bridge to the pub for a refreshing gallon or two of medicine.

Doesn't remember the week after.

wanders off singing 'Road to the Ilses'



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/05/2011 07:13AM by bunyip.

<notices Bunyip's story of lost week was told seven days ago.>

<checks treehouse for signs of chrono-synclastic infundibula>

<finds only bagpipe-infested haggis in corner>

<calls Carpenter-Walrus Cleaners, requests seven maids with seven mops>

<waits>

<is still disturbed by lack of activity>

<blows dust off the statue of the mighty Shatner>

<does some general cleaning>

<ponders weighty philosophical and political issues>

<blames the place where books are de-face-d for the inactivity>

<wonders how to lure folks back here>

<puts on a fresh pot of cocoa>

<awaits further suggestions>

Have reaD BOOK ON cORNISH MINERS

READ OF TRADITIONAL PASTIE BEING MEAT & VEG AT ONE END AND APPLE & CUSTARD AT OTHER

pushes "caps lock' key

continues

decides to invent savoury and sweet pie

takes finished product to Treehouse but realises forgot to mark sweet side with S and savoury side with another s.

stands back to watch for outcome

stands silently in special site to see.

<takes bite of proffered delicacy>

<unable to decide which end is which bites middle>

<ends up with mouthful of sweet & sour pork and pineapple upside down cake in pastry>

<marks other pasties 's' for surprise>

<Wanders in, realises that although there are a lot of very guilty looking people nobody is wearing a wig and gown, realises is in the wrong place and wanders out again.>

misreads geg's post

wonders what Wigan town is doing in this thread

wonders what people are looking guilty about

could it be that all the letters on the pies have been switched around to cause confusion?

goes off to invent sandwich pie which is marked with an 'S" to avoid any possibility of confusion for visitors.

<posts a warning sign against naming pies flavors while they are munched on>

<remembers that noone will talk in the treehouse anyway>

<wonders if you will still spray crumbs when only writing about S-flavoured pies?>

<Returns to the Treehouse to find some of the people looking guilty all of the time and all of the people looking guilty some of the time, breathes huge sigh of relief as is no longer responsible for deciding which is which.>
<Buys Treehouse Times and is disturbed by front page headline warning about pie swapping pandemic. Is relived by page 3 to discover that all suspect pies have been marked with an S to make them easily detectable.>

<is planning on taking just one special pie to the Ffiesta>

<does not know how to show it is special, although as it is a CMOT-provided pie suspects that it will be obvious>

<reads newspaper over geg's shoulder>

<looks down at the pie in left hand notices the large S>

<throws it out the treehouse door>

<carries on reading over geg's shoulder>

<sees double page spread on royal wedding dresses>

<starts poll on the alternative pie referendum>

<Feels certain ES is wasting his time as is pretty certain there's already an APp for that.>
<Wonders how the Invisible Ruler feels about having a referendum in a dictatorship.>
<Chooses divine Royal Wedding dress for invisible ruler in the hope that clothing will rectify invisibility, thereby making revolution a safer option. Wonders why nobody thought of that before.>
< Doesn't mind sharing paper with LE - but does wish she would stop filling in all the easy crossword clues.>
<Goes off to plan spontaneous revolt.>

<Signs lengthy paperwork to join revolt>

<votes yes to alternative pie>

<wonders which side of revolt to be on: custard or jam?>

<declares a 'we love the invisible ruler' day>

<moves into palace and sets up deck chair>

<Pushes ES off the fence>
<Hangs invisible bunting, wave invisible flag, organises invisible street party.>
<Decides to postpone revolution until after the celebrations, in the hope that they involve cake.>

<Creates an official Facebook page for the invisible ruler>

<tries to like page, but is unable to see it>

<stumbles in>

<looks at guilty faces, sees geg doing something that looks like fast-paced yoga, notes the over-abundance of pies>

<is glad that last few hours were spent in making a chocolate cake with chocolate icing, a white cake with vanilla frosting (with multi-color sprinkles), and some strawberry Jell-O>

<sets cakes, etc., on table, sees no need to mark them as anything since several people have already started drooling>

<grabs cake knife and plate to get a piece of chocolate cake before the ravening beasts, who no longer look guilty, inhale the cake>

<runs to corner to get out of the way, hopes the cake is good...>