New users: Please register in the usual way and then send an email to jasper(at)jasperfforde.com with your username, and write something 'Ffordesque' so we know you are a real reader, and not some idiot trying to flood the forum with dodgy Nike and Gucci gear. Thank you - Jasper
00) Mostly mineral.
01) Is it wooden? No, not wooden.
02) Bigger than a breadbox? It would not fit in a breadbox.
03) Mount Everest? No, no, no. Not a mountain at all, in fact!
04) A diamond as big as the Ritz? No, sorry, not a diamond as big as the Ritz (either cracker or hotel).
05) Found indoors? No, you wouldn't think of it being indoors.
06) Manufactured? Yes, definitely.
07) Does it contain a battery? No! No! Nooooooooooo!
08) Has it got moving parts? Yes
09) Would it move OB? Yes,
10) Is it an infernal contradiction engine? No, it is not an infernal contradiction engine. If it were I would have had to contradict you anyway!
11) Is it a bicycle made for one? Emphatically not!
00) Mostly mineral.
01) Is it wooden? No, not wooden.
02) Bigger than a breadbox? It would not fit in a breadbox.
03) Mount Everest? No, no, no. Not a mountain at all, in fact!
04) A diamond as big as the Ritz? No, sorry, not a diamond as big as the Ritz (either cracker or hotel).
05) Found indoors? No, you wouldn't think of it being indoors.
06) Manufactured? Yes, definitely.
07) Does it contain a battery? No! No! Nooooooooooo!
08) Has it got moving parts? Yes
09) Would it move OB? Yes,
10) Is it an infernal contradiction engine? No, it is not an infernal contradiction engine. If it were I would have had to contradict you anyway!
11) Is it a bicycle made for one? Emphatically not!
12) Is it a tandem? No, you're treading a dodgy path.
00) Mostly mineral.
01) Is it wooden? No, not wooden.
02) Bigger than a breadbox? It would not fit in a breadbox.
03) Mount Everest? No, no, no. Not a mountain at all, in fact!
04) A diamond as big as the Ritz? No, sorry, not a diamond as big as the Ritz (either cracker or hotel).
05) Found indoors? No, you wouldn't think of it being indoors.
06) Manufactured? Yes, definitely.
07) Does it contain a battery? No! No! Nooooooooooo!
08) Has it got moving parts? Yes
09) Would it move OB? Yes,
10) Is it an infernal contradiction engine? No, it is not an infernal contradiction engine. If it were I would have had to contradict you anyway!
11) Is it a bicycle made for one? Emphatically not!
12) Is it a tandem? No, you're treading a dodgy path.
13) Is it's primary purpose transportation? Yes.
00) Mostly mineral.
01) Is it wooden? No, not wooden.
02) Bigger than a breadbox? It would not fit in a breadbox.
03) Mount Everest? No, no, no. Not a mountain at all, in fact!
04) A diamond as big as the Ritz? No, sorry, not a diamond as big as the Ritz (either cracker or hotel).
05) Found indoors? No, you wouldn't think of it being indoors.
06) Manufactured? Yes, definitely.
07) Does it contain a battery? No! No! Nooooooooooo!
08) Has it got moving parts? Yes
09) Would it move OB? Yes,
10) Is it an infernal contradiction engine? No, it is not an infernal contradiction engine. If it were I would have had to contradict you anyway!
11) Is it a bicycle made for one? Emphatically not!
12) Is it a tandem? No, you're treading a dodgy path.
13) Is it's primary purpose transportation? Yes.
14) Does it have four wheels? No, it does not have exactly four wheels. (I could have been so mean!)
00) Mostly mineral.
01) Is it wooden? No, not wooden.
02) Bigger than a breadbox? It would not fit in a breadbox.
03) Mount Everest? No, no, no. Not a mountain at all, in fact!
04) A diamond as big as the Ritz? No, sorry, not a diamond as big as the Ritz (either cracker or hotel).
05) Found indoors? No, you wouldn't think of it being indoors.
06) Manufactured? Yes, definitely.
07) Does it contain a battery? No! No! Nooooooooooo!
08) Has it got moving parts? Yes
09) Would it move OB? Yes,
10) Is it an infernal contradiction engine? No, it is not an infernal contradiction engine. If it were I would have had to contradict you anyway!
11) Is it a bicycle made for one? Emphatically not!
12) Is it a tandem? No, you're treading a dodgy path.
13) Is it's primary purpose transportation? Yes.
14) Does it have four wheels? No, it does not have exactly four wheels. (I could have been so mean!)
15) Is it a Reliant Robin? Nope, it is not a Reliant Robin.
00) Mostly mineral.
01) Is it wooden? No, not wooden.
02) Bigger than a breadbox? It would not fit in a breadbox.
03) Mount Everest? No, no, no. Not a mountain at all, in fact!
04) A diamond as big as the Ritz? No, sorry, not a diamond as big as the Ritz (either cracker or hotel).
05) Found indoors? No, you wouldn't think of it being indoors.
06) Manufactured? Yes, definitely.
07) Does it contain a battery? No! No! Nooooooooooo!
08) Has it got moving parts? Yes
09) Would it move OB? Yes,
10) Is it an infernal contradiction engine? No, it is not an infernal contradiction engine. If it were I would have had to contradict you anyway!
11) Is it a bicycle made for one? Emphatically not!
12) Is it a tandem? No, you're treading a dodgy path.
13) Is its primary purpose transportation? Yes.
14) Does it have four wheels? No, it does not have exactly four wheels. (I could have been so mean!)
15) Is it a Reliant Robin? Nope, it is not a Reliant Robin.
16) Does it have three wheels? No, it does not have exactly three wheels.
17) Is it a wheelbarrow? No.
00) Mostly mineral.
01) Is it wooden? No, not wooden.
02) Bigger than a breadbox? It would not fit in a breadbox.
03) Mount Everest? No, no, no. Not a mountain at all, in fact!
04) A diamond as big as the Ritz? No, sorry, not a diamond as big as the Ritz (either cracker or hotel).
05) Found indoors? No, you wouldn't think of it being indoors.
06) Manufactured? Yes, definitely.
07) Does it contain a battery? No! No! Nooooooooooo!
08) Has it got moving parts? Yes
09) Would it move OB? Yes,
10) Is it an infernal contradiction engine? No, it is not an infernal contradiction engine. If it were I would have had to contradict you anyway!
11) Is it a bicycle made for one? Emphatically not!
12) Is it a tandem? No, you're treading a dodgy path.
13) Is its primary purpose transportation? Yes.
14) Does it have four wheels? No, it does not have exactly four wheels. (I could have been so mean!)
15) Is it a Reliant Robin? Nope, it is not a Reliant Robin.
16) Does it have three wheels? No, it does not have exactly three wheels.
17) Is it a wheelbarrow? No.
18) Is it a unicycle? Nope. Sigh. Waggle waggle.