I am mobile courtesy of four wheel drive and wondering what the facilities were like for us duracell dizzies at the Ffestival? (read disabled, electric wheelchair users)

And a thought occured to me - why aren't there any dizzzies in the Nextian universe? We are sorely under-represented. Surely Jasper could find me and a few of my cronies a job in the Library. I'd love to work there.And while he's at it, he could invent something better to get me around than this old crip-cart I'm sitting on now; wonder what he'd come up with?

TTFN

Now I'm caught between imagining being carried around in a sedan chair by several handsome young things, or something which is self-driven and hovers -- possibly even hovers and hoovers, floating about the Great Library carpets and removing specks of dirt tracked in by Col Bradshaw.

Ooh
If I have a coice I think I'll go for the sedan chair, with four hulking Nubians or similar! Being a huge Jane Austen fan that really appeals to me. Hoovering I have enough of in this world, please dont make me do it in the Nextian one!

ooops "choice"

I'm thinkin' jet packs.

Jet Packs would be cool but what fuel? Have to environmentally friendly and renewable - are you thinking what I'm thinking?
I rather fancied something modelled on the ship (scaled down of course) from The Extraordinary League of Gentlemen,
Ta-ra
Nettie

PS Anyone know where I can buy bookworms? I fnacy starting a new farming industry here in Wales that's not affected by foot and mouth.

Nettie I am loving the name 'dizzies' - did you think of it or is it the vernacular?

Vernacular. I have a disabled friend who actually calls herself a 'crip'. I think it's like the gay movement 'reclaiming' words like 'queer' etc.

Hi OCNot,
Actually the word Dizzies is all mine, and I pre-fixed it with Duracell when I had to start using an electric wheelchair instead of a manual one a few years ago, (at least I know of no other who uses it) but crip-cart and spaz-waggon are two affectionate terms for wheelchairs that my buddies and I use to use at boarding school.
As you can tell I'm not very PC about my disability!! My husband and kids are merciless ribbers anyway, and very little is off-limits. We're all comfy in our own skins here
TTFN

My mate Helen used to call her chair a quad-bike.

Do you find it to be a hearing aid.

I have heard and seen reports that people talking to those in a wheelie way of life usually talk louder to the point of shouting.


Friend of mine (From my days working in rehabilitation industry) was a wheelie and she had the most fascinating collection of unPC jokes and stories. Jokes like: what do you call a legless man in a forest? Russell. What do you call a legless man in the ocean? Bob. Is a prostitute in a coma a root vegetable? What is the namer of a one legged lass? Eileen.

Stories like one Oz wheelie weight lifter who was in a car accident which injured what he had lefty of his legs. Before he went into surgery he asked if they could lop about 4inches off his stumps, as this would move him to a lower weight division and he could still lift the same amount.

Friend of mine from years earlier was a wheelie from age 18 after he broke his back. I was with him when some yobbos started to insult him and some others in the group. He told them to push off, and when they didn't he grabbed one by the arm and snapped the arm midway between the wrist and elbow. Then he told them to go away again, and they did.

Hey bunyip!

I know all those jokes and more (but mine are longer so I wont bore you here). I do find some people think I'm deaf too, usually the older generation, but the best is when I take my assistance dog out with me,Wearing his little yellow jacket.
People automatically think I'm blind too. They often tap me on the shoulder and say things like "its ok, I didnt want to make you jump" to which I reply "Thanks but I'm not actually blind."

It works both ways though. MY friends say they forget I'm in a wheelchair and often end up asking me inane questions.

MY 21 year old son came up with the classic though, beats all others! When he was 14 he'd been to the local ice rink for the first time ever. He came home telling me all about how he felt a banana because there were little kids there whizzing round and he was falling flat on his rear every five feet, and he actually turned round and said "how old were you when you learned to skate mum?" It was the biggest compliment of my life to know my kids saw me as no different to other mums,and my determination never to use them as my carers and paid dividends!

Oh and when I'm being naughty my husband calls me "wicked wheelie wife"

I imagine having an assistance dog helps start conversations, too, because everyone will want to pet it!

My friend is blind and recently got a guide dog, and he is the most amazing animal I've ever seen. He's incredibly intelligent and seems to love working. Plus, he's fun to play with when he's not at work.

My cousin trains assistance dogs, it is a facinating thing to watch. Spent a summer there one year and got to see the entire process. It's incredible how smart they are!

Actually I have two at the moment, both black Labs. MY male is 12 and just retired last week, the new one (a bitch) is 18 motnths old and crazy! Its like having a kid again. Although we have officially qualified and she can wear her jacket with pride, we are still working on our relationship together and I'm teaching her a new task every week. So far she can open/shut doors, fetch her food bowl, pick up anything I ask, speak to command (in case I fall and need help) and take messages to my hubbie upstairs or in the garden shed!
Oh and she now only uses the Dog bog my husband built in the garden for them both, so they dont kill the grass!

I do work with the Royal Society for the Blind in SA - currently in limbo while the surgical profession uses me as en experimental and teaching aid - and they have started organising the training of guide dogs.

A friend of mine from years ago told me of her son when he was very young hearing of guide dogs and getting the facts slightly mixed up. Telling his parents that he thought it was wonderful that people took these blind dogs for walks, etc.

Yeah - its quite common over here too. People come up to me and ask "Is that a blind dog? "I always reply "No, his sight is fine, thank you" It really throws them. The faces they pull as they try to work it out is so funny :))

The reason that there are few dizzies (electrically powered or otherwise) in the Library, and in bookworld is probably that there are very few in fiction in general, and so there isn't much of source for him to dip into.

As for the lack in the Nextian world... I dunno. Doesn't Landen have a prosthetic leg?.. maybe medical/genetic/prosthetic science can help most dizzies stand on some sort of feet...

Rob

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That statement is either so deep it would take a lifetime to fully comprehend every particle of its meaning, or it is a load of absolute tosh. Which is it, I wonder?
Terry Pratchett, Hogfather

Oh yeah, that's right, Landen lost a leg in the Crimean War.