Please note 'forever' in the above strapline does not refer literally to a neverending state of safe guardianship,
but rather the mildy fanciful notion that we are your servants for a period of time that may or may not exist into the future.

Welcome to the Special Operations Network's new website

By 1991, SpecOps was in disarray. Due to the rapidly expanding size of the network and the ever-increasing managerial skill needed for its continued smooth running, SpecOps had become a massive drain on the Nation's resources. Faced with extensive fiscal cuts in the now-infamous 1992 budget, SpecOps upper management decided on a bold new vision: to maintain the prized SpecOps bureaucracy intact, and disband the service.

We at SO-1 are happy to report that the decreased workload has been extremely welcome, allowing us to concentrate our resources on improved management without the burden of actually having to run anything, and we can now boast levels of efficiency that are greatly in excess of those when we had to actually do something.

Unfortunately, due to a clerical oversight we still have five SpecOps departments, a sorry state of affairs that serves only to taint our increased nonproductivity

If you are having any sort of problems regarding those five, then this website may be of use. If your concern regards one of the disbanded departments, we suggest calling the police or, failing that, hiding under a table until the danger has passed.

Who We Are and What We Do

The Cheese Squad

Frequently Asked Questions

Go back to Grand Central

This website supports all browsers but please note the BusyBody (TM) Mandatory SpecOps-49 browsertracker must be enabled. Misuse of the SpecOps website is a crime punishable by up to five years closed-loop temporal field containment (enloopment) with no remission. For optimum viewing use GoliathBrowser Version 7.8
Buy SpecOps Stuff

Official Sponsors: Toast!

SpecOps.org.uk Sanctioned By SpecOps mandate 3819/bd32 Version2.1
copyright 2002. All rights reserved. last updated: 19th June 2002