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Over a thousand icebergs and several leading glaciers were yesterday earmarked to be included in the biggest liquidation sale for the past million years.

The stock of icebergs, until recently safely locked up in Arctic and Antarctic 'ice sheet' warehouses, were said to be 'ready for immediate delivery to consumers' in what has been described as the largest giveaway of frozen water in living memory, and certainly beyond.

"We've never seen such a dramatic dumping of ice on the world market," exclaimed bottled water stockist Ivan Norris yesterday, "and I'm ready to get my share as soon as the cycle of evaporation and precipitation takes place."

Mr Norris, who does not live near the coast, is only one of billions who will benefit from the greatly increased stocks currently being released by the Earth Goddess.

Josh Hatchett, reporting for The Toad, London

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Icebergs in Liquidation Sale
Over a thousand icebergs and several leading glaciers were yesterday earmarked to be included in the biggest liquidation sale for the past million years. The stock of icebergs, until recently safely locked up in Arctic and Antarctic 'ice sheet' warehouses, were said to be 'ready for immediate delivery to consumers' in what has been described as the largest giveaway of frozen water in living memory, and certainly beyond. "We've never seen such a dramatic dumping of ice on the world market," exclaimed bottled water stockist Ivan Norris yesterday, "and I'm ready to get my share as soon as the cycle of evaporation and precipitation takes place." Mr Norris, who does not live near the coast, is only one of billions who will benefit from the greatly increased stocks currently being released by the Earth Goddess. *Josh Hatchett, reporting for The Toad,* London**	Just one of the icebergs coming to you in an aqueous form over the next century.


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