The Penguin Book of Verse
Posted by:
Sarah (---.vip.uk.com)
Date: December 15, 2002 09:17PM
<HTML>Ladies and gentlemen of the Fforum, I should like to present the natural successor to William McGonagall: Wilfred T Penguin. (I understand the T stands for "The".) Wilfred's hobbies are drinking, reading over my shoulder and creatively misunderstanding the book, drinking, writing poetry, drinking, impersonating a dodo, and drinking. In his spare time, he generally drinks.
This is what happened when I let him read poetry over my shoulder. I do apologise...
I have just been told all about this Persian bloke called Omar Khayyam,
Who sold millions of copies of his poetry and was generally as drunk as I am.
So now I am wondering why I haven't also become an instant success;
I know he went in for wine rather than whiskey, but that shouldn't make any difference, I would guess.
I believe he wrote one that started "A jug of wine, a loaf of bread, and Thou";
Well, I could certainly improve on that - it's not difficult to see how.
You could have whiskey instead, or even rum, brandy, vodka, schnapps or gin,
And if you're going to have something to eat with it, then not to have a nice fat squid would be a sin.
Now what about "Thou"? - I mean, who the heck is "Thee"?
Is that supposed to be the person who is reading it, or possibly the penguin, eg me?
Or is it someone else? - he really ought to make up his mind, and quick;
Oh well, let's see: "A jug of whiskey, a nice fat squid, and... hic!"
(c) Wilfred T Penguin (he insists I put that in, for what it's worth...)</HTML>