For all you fellow gutter wallowers (and you know who you are), here is the first installment of the long-awaited rules.

1. Wipe your feet before you get in (or fall in, as the case may be)
2. If dragged in against your better judgement, please keep kicking and screaming to a minimum
3. No children or cats allowed (dodos may attend if they bring their own marshmallows)

Feel free to add to the rules as you see fit. If you wish to contest a rule, you may submit your request in triplicate to the Society for Management of Unsavory Talk.

4. Make sure that if you are drinking lemonade, it has some form of alcohol in
it. Non-alcoholic beverages are not allowed.



Post Edited (08-01-03 18:32)

We are all of us in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars

- Oscar Fingal Flahertie O'Wills Wilde



- - -
I am very interested in the Universe. I am specialising in the Universe and everything surrounding it. - E. L. Wisty

Jon - I used that very quotation last night in the pub to my friend! Odd!

Another odd thing is that the pub were playing Round the Horne tapes over the speakers - but only in the loos! P**ing to Rambling Sid Rumpole is a very strange experience. I suppose I should just count myself lucky it wasn't to the Fraser Hayes Four - I'd be trying to keep synchopated time!

Regarding cats not being allowed in the gutter:

Minsky says he has far more interesting places to go, thank you.
Heidi is far too posh to want to go into a gutter.
Chomsky isn't bright enough to know what a gutter is.

And Klinsmann says, "Just you try to keep ME out, humans!"

:-)



..........................................................................................

That which does not kill us makes us stranger.
(Llewelyn the dragon, Ozy and Millie)

Sarah

Rule 5: All innuendo should be accepted in good grace and humor.

Rule 6: Only those pre-approved Sesame Street songs are allowed. For complete approved list please see Slightcap in Song approval.

Rule 7: Upon entering gutter, please don't try to leave. It really is a waste of time. :-)

Rule 8: The price of O's (or o's) is permanently set at 5 cents apiece.

Rule 9: If you make a rule you have to be prepared to follow it (this one is for you, slightcap)

Rule 10: Try not to scare anyone away with unsanctioned references to 'The Muppet Show'

Nobody ever said that I was actually in the gutter. Therefore i can drink my non-alcoholic lemonade and not break any of the rules. And Klinsman, you can sit with me. We will sit and watch the other fools wallowing in the gutter and laugh together.

The Irish Pig

'Twas an evening in November,
As I very well remember.
I was strolling down the street in drunken pride,
But my knees were all aflutter,
So I landed in the gutter,
And a pig came up and lay down by my side.
Yes, I lay there in the gutter
Thinking thoughts I could not utter,
When a colleen passing by did softly say,
"You can tell a man that boozes
By the company he chooses."
At that the pig got up and walked away!



- - -
I am very interested in the Universe. I am specialising in the Universe and everything surrounding it. - E. L. Wisty

Oh very good Jon!!!

Excellent!!!!!

It's trad., of course (arr. Anonymous). Various versions exist.



- - -
I am very interested in the Universe. I am specialising in the Universe and everything surrounding it. - E. L. Wisty

Slightcap, I seem to remember at least 1 song that got you into it. (Singing Sesame Street songs can be a hazardous occupation.)

<Eeeuw, too much alliteration>

Jon, welcome to our gutter!



Post Edited (08-01-03 17:54)

Very true. I believe it was called "Let's Do It." However, that was only after extreme exposure to those already in the gutter, and had nothing to do with what I was drinking at the time.



Post Edited (08-01-03 17:58)

Rule 11: Prolonged exposure to those already wallowing in the gutter is automatic admittance to said gutter.

Rule 12: If you don't get the innuendo, it will eventually be spelled out for you.

13. If you do not wish to add alcohol to your beverage, no one need know about it. Lying about what you are drinking is encouraged. (Ha Ha)

Slightcap, I knew we would corrupt you eventually. Truthfulness is always the first thing to go!

14. If you can't beat them, say a lot of nasty words, take a swig of your drink, and then join them.



Post Edited (08-01-03 18:41)

Hear Hear Slightcap!!!