Hey CannibalRabbit! Does that mean that you belong to the said profession of accountants?

I don't think I've ever worked anywhwere where thay have actually advocated killing the acountants, but there has been a fairly general concensus that they should be retitled as "Sales Prevention Officers" :-)

(edited due to early morning inability to type correctly!)



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/29/2007 09:55AM by The Cookster.

Afraid so Cookster, we are coming out of a period where accountants are viewed as an unnecessary, but compulsory overhead.

Part of that is because we keep on telling people the bad news - and there was a whole lot to tell. I have just been involved in a period of strategic roadblock removal - hopefully some of that now gets implemented. But that will come down to management interpretation! Now that is where we get down to a "...we haven't got enough sales to support that level of costs, so lets cut costs ..." sort of mentality. But that is the end of that particular rant.

But I love the title - I'm beginning to get he idea that the collective noun for a group of accountants is a a "flock". Because whenever two or more of us walk around the office we hear screams and "here come the flocking accountants". Mind you my hearing might be going a bit as well!

:-)

I've often been referred to as being accountant myself .......... like you my hearing may also have become slightly impaired :-)

Is Cannibalrabbit a reference to accounting then?

not as far as I'm aware! I was just looking for a domain name about four years ago and it seemed like a nice juxtaposition. At the moment I'm using BrizBunny more, I need to swap hosts and get it going again.

Sales prevention officers?
I have a better idea. Don't kill the accountants, kill the creators of Managerese!

Tip for breaking bad financial news #47

Dress up in a silly hat and wrap the news that the auditors are on their way by making it sound like a riddle. While the managers are figuring it out, you'll have plenty of time to escape.

The classic piece of managerese - grow the business - well with the amount of bullsh* that goes around it just a case of adding water and anything should grow. Oh apart from the sales line, because the sales forcehave been strategically down-sized, to save costs!!

Down Sized? Is that like De-cruited and de-hiring, cutting away 'dead wood' etc?

It's when everyone has to be upskilled, preferably proactively. [I mistyped that as 'proctively' which, on reflection, has a nicer ring to it]

Beeing proctily upskilled sounds like something that would happen to a chicken just before it got on the barbecue...

I have read books which have included the statements that we should kill all lawyers/politicians/used car sales men/ taxi drivers/priests/ and some others on principle, on the grounds that anybody who had the desire to be one of these things was ill-fitted socially to be allowed free run in a community of decent people.

While not agreeing with it in total I think that followers of these professions should have to be vouched for on a regular basis, like every 6 months or so. And the support should have to be unanimous. Any dissent and off with their heads, as the red Queen was wont to say.


Add your own choice of professions.

To diverge to another thread: You may put them on the list.....

Friend of mine is a proctologist. Met him when he came back to uni and studied philosophy.

He reckons proctology gives one a good training in assessing edicts from authority.

But to change to accountants: when I worked in the newspapers in London town we had 'financial' accountants, which means 'bean counters' in a looser language and they were all grey humourless people who had less personality than a bit of road kill.

The others were 'cost and management' accountants and these people created the budgets, made up the submissions to the Prices Justification Tribunal, and did the forecasts for future planning. Some of these had personality, even enough to talk to (elsewhere mentioned) page 3 girls who came into our building for the photo shoots.

I was a cost accountant for a while, and these are the people who if asked : 'what does one plus one equal' will answer 'what do you want it to add to?'

Cookster,

Re being call an accountant:


I went to a club recently and they asked me if I was a member.

I said I was a country member, and they replied "We remember"


<exits shaking head trying to find little white pills that stop old joke memory from functioning.>



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/05/2007 02:07AM by bunyip.

<quite liking the effect it's having, decides not to tell Bunyip where he has hidden the little white pills>