well i guess their behaviour is a joke. Couldn't you claim expenses for the interview? sometimes you can.

That's very bad form. Certainly as bad as Jetstar charging job applicants a $79 fee for an interview.

Skidmarks: Goodonyer, mate.

As the Klingons would say: "Revenge is a dish best served cold".
Marcus Auralius may also said it but I think he nicked it from the Klingons.

With fava beans and a nice chianti.

I'm sure they'll love you for who you are fforumite of not!
Surely you could get a refund? or something, it's times like those that you should have a really friendly pet lawyer on hand..
We named our first dog after ours ^_^

Here is a decreasing bad joke:

Guy runs in to a doctors office and says "Doctor Doctor I think I'm shrinking", Doctor says " you'll have to be a little patient"

*snort* I'm going to have to remember that one…

Doctor doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains!

Pull yourself together man!

__________________________________
'We're all mad here. I'm mad, you're mad." [said the Cat.]
"How do you know I'm mad?" said Alice.
"You must be," said the Cat, "Or you wouldn't have come here."
- Lewis Carroll, Alice's Adventures In Wonderland

Guy runs in to a Doctors office wearing a pair of clingwrap shorts. Doctor says "I can clearly see your nuts!"

Two Bedouin twin brothers were each given a horse for their birthday. The boys loved their horses, but were forever arguing about which horse belonged to which boy.

Eventually they decided to seek the advice of a wise old man so that they could tell which horse was which.

After much deliberation, the wise old man called the boys back to him and said "Why don't you tie a red ribbon around the neck of the grey and leave the bay with no ribbon."

The boys went away happy.

+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+

My computer beat me at chess, but I won at kickboxing

OOOOH! You are evil! You stole the only joke I know! :P

//does not get it

Two identical twins are seperated at birth, one adopted by a Spanish family and is named Juan and another by an Arabic family and named Amal.
Many years later the Spanish mother tracks down Amal and meets him. Her husband is unable to come along and asks what Amal is like.
She replies, "If you've seen Juan you've seen Amal."

//coat

__________________________________
'We're all mad here. I'm mad, you're mad." [said the Cat.]
"How do you know I'm mad?" said Alice.
"You must be," said the Cat, "Or you wouldn't have come here."
- Lewis Carroll, Alice's Adventures In Wonderland

Er...

How do you get an elephant in a fridge?

Open the door and put the elephant inside?

__________________________________
'We're all mad here. I'm mad, you're mad." [said the Cat.]
"How do you know I'm mad?" said Alice.
"You must be," said the Cat, "Or you wouldn't have come here."
- Lewis Carroll, Alice's Adventures In Wonderland

take the giraffes out?

It depends. Indian or African?

Skeleton walks into a bar. "I'd like a beer and a mop."

The Thunder God went for a ride
Upon his favourite filly
"I'm Thor!" he cried
The horse replied,
"You forgot your thaddle, thilly."

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses.
He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed.
The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services.
He gasps: "My friend is dead! What can I do?"
The operator says: "Calm down, I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard.
Back on the phone, the guy says: "OK, now what?"

I was involved in a great example of oral contraception the other night. I asked a girl to go to bed with me, and she said "no."

(Woody Allen)

This woman rushes to see her doctor, looking very much worried and all strung out.

She rattles off: "Doctor, take a look at me. When I woke up this morning, I looked at myself in the mirror and saw my hair all wiry and frazzled up, my skin was all wrinkled and pasty, my eyes were bloodshot and bugging out and I had this corpse-like look on my face! What's WRONG with me, Doctor!?"


The doctor looks her over for a couple of minutes, then calmly says: "Well, I can tell you that there isn't anything wrong with your eyesight...."