I second that!

(only if you want to, though)



-------------------------
Metaphors be with you!

There they go again.
Some bloke lets it slip that he's vulnerable and available and they descend like vultures. The cat fight will start in about 3 posts.

What? I'm just fishing for funny stories!

(Shall we this fond pageant see?...)



-------------------------
Metaphors be with you!

Did someone say cat-fight?
(prepares claws)

I had a cat fight about half an hour ago, when a neighbours cat tried coming in my front door. She's half adopted us and when her owners are out she comes visiting us, always trying to get inside. I wouldn't mind, because she is a lovely cat, but I have a pet cockatiel she always eyes off beadily and my usband is allergic to cats, to she cant' come in, much to her disgust.


Of course, the above has nothing to do with changing the subject away from Martins details of his first date that he's going to give us.

1. WHAT IS YOUR FULL NAME?
Robert Samuel Waller


2. WHAT COLOR PANTS ARE YOU WEARING?
Blue Jeans covered in the Stuffed Pork I spilled on them about 1/2 Hour ago.

3. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
Some Junk on television I'm trying to Ignore about William Shatner "Changing" the world.

4. WHAT ARE THE LAST 4 DIGITS OF YOUR PHONE NUMBER?
Juan, True, Fight, S-x

5. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
Stuffed Pork

6. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
Flesh

7. HOW IS THE WEATHER RIGHT NOW?
Dark and cooling down

8. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
My nuerologists nurse.

9. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX?
If it is my wife or not.

10. FAVOURITE BOOK?
Good Omens by Gaiman and Prattchett, or Sandman a graphic novel in ten+ graphic novels.

11. HOW ARE YOU TODAY?
Well balanced and getting better.

12. FAVORITE DRINK NON ALCOHOLIC?
Chai Latte

13. FAVORITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK?
Malibu Rum

14. FAVORITE SPORTS?
Playing: Tennis (Which I cannot do anymore due to Multiple Sclerosis.)
Watching: Football (as the most of the world knows it.), or American Football.

HAIR COLOR?
Brown, broken up by large areas of scalp.

16. EYE COLOR?
Blue/Grey

17. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
No.

18. SIBLINGS AND THEIR AGES:
1 Sister (younger and to tell her age is more than my life is worth!)

19. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FOOD?
Mushroom and Pepperoni Pizza, or my Aunt's Matzoh ball Soup. (But I never have seen where she keeps her live Matzoh, and how she harvests the main peices.)

20. TEMPER OR MILD MANNERED?
Temper but I am terrified of losing it.

21. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
Hoodwinked (I give it six thumbs up!)

22. FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR?
Any day I buy a new book, or one comes in the mail.

23. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT?
No!

24. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS BETTER?
Happy Endings

25. SUMMER OR WINTER?
Winter - More snuggling time!

26. HUGS OR KISSES?
Hugs!

27. RELATIONSHIPS OR ONE NIGHT STANDS?
Since my 16th wedding anniversary is in a week, I guess relationships.

28. CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA?
Chocolate everyday, Vanilla for a treat!

29. DO YOU WANT YOUR FRIENDS TO WRITE BACK?
I am more a verbal person myself, but only in person! I despise that foul evil called the Telephone!

30. TEA, LIAGB or WOLP?
TEA but the I have not read the other three just yet, TEA was Tue. & Wed.. The others are next week Over Easy is Today and Tomorrow. Sat is review night, and Sunday is well veg day.

31. WHICH NEXTIAN CHARACTER IS MOST LIKE YOU?
Thurday's Brother whose name has escaped me, and is raising religion all over my living room!

32. LIVING ARRANGEMENTS?
My wife and I along with our two Dogs, and our four Overlords known as the CATS, live in our three bedroom house in Irving, Texas.

33. WHAT BOOKS ARE YOU READING?
The Big Over Easy (Fiction) and, You mean I'm not Lazy, Stupid, or Crazy, a book for Adults with ADD. (Non-Fiction <Unless you are a scientologist.>)

34. WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
My Wireless mouse, what else would be on there my printer?

35. FAVORITE BOARD GAME?
Monopoly

36. WHAT DID YOU DO LAST NIGHT?
Ate dinner, cleaned the litter boxes, fed the cats, ate dinner, read the begining 6 chapters of Big Over Easy, told my wife I loved her, watched a rerun of Family Guy, and went to sleep.

37. FAVORITE SMELLS?
My wife when she wears that perfume she was wearing when we met back in '82.

38. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP IN THE
MORNING?
What time is it, and why did I wake up this early.

39. How old where you when you went on your first date?
16 and on my 16th birthday no less.

40. What's your favorite sound?
Either my overlord purring, or my Dog exited barking when I come home, or my wife saying, "Why don't you go ahead and buy that now."

Is that all the questions?

1. WHAT IS YOUR FULL NAME?
Paul Harris

2. WHAT COLOR PANTS ARE YOU WEARING?
Blue combats, not as bad as they sound.

3. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
A Gentelmans Excuse Me by Fish (the guy that sang Kayliegh)

4. WHAT ARE THE LAST 4 DIGITS OF YOUR PHONE NUMBER?
which one, I have several

5. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
The flesh of a chicken

6. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
This week it would be a vivid red, maybe even puce

7. HOW IS THE WEATHER RIGHT NOW?
Can't see it's too dark

8. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
My daughter to sort out who I'm going to see on parents evening

9. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX?
Hair length and colour

10. FAVOURITE BOOK?
Star Wartz by Patrick Tilley

11. HOW ARE YOU TODAY?
Calming down after a week that's best forgotten

12. FAVORITE DRINK NON ALCOHOLIC?
Vimto, hot

13. FAVORITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK?
Tequila

14. FAVORITE SPORTS?
Cricket, rugby(either code) Motoer sprot in general

15. HAIR COLOR?
Brown round the sides, with a liddel bit of cover in the middle these days

16. EYE COLOR?
Very clear blue

17. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
No

18. SIBLINGS AND THEIR AGES:
Step sister aged don't really know, only she her once or twice a year
Brother, older don't want to know as he isn't the sort of person I like to see
Half sister 13 in a couple of months

19. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FOOD?
Mexican

20. TEMPER OR MILD MANNERED?
Depends on whats happened in the last half hour

21. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
SERENTIY! Go out and watch this it really is a good film

22. FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR?
Used to be my birthday, but these days, when someone buys me a meal

23. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT?
No, and not a had yes for a while

24. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS BETTER?
Both

25. SUMMER OR WINTER?
Like both

26. HUGS OR KISSES?
Hugs

27. RELATIONSHIPS OR ONE NIGHT STANDS?
Relationships, done one night stands and I didn't like how I felt the next day

28. CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA?
Chocolate.

29. DO YOU WANT YOUR FRIENDS TO WRITE BACK?
Of course

30. TEA, LIAGB or WOLP?
Can't pick, okay okay TES

31. WHICH NEXTIAN CHARACTER IS MOST LIKE YOU?
Piackwick

32. LIVING ARRANGEMENTS?
With my cat in the week, pick up my 2 daughters on friday, and they stay till bed time sunday

33. WHAT BOOKS ARE YOU READING?
Yellow Dog my Martin Amis ane Blood of ANgles by MAicheal Marshall at home and The Wind From Bukkra by ---------- at work( I'll edit this on monday, after I've written who wrote it on the back of my hand)

34. WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
A mercades 1955 300 SL, the West Maclaren F1 car and the Mercades new SLK

35. FAVORITE BOARD GAME?
Monopoly.

36. WHAT DID YOU DO LAST NIGHT?
Ate dinner, cleaned the litter boxes, fed the cat, watched disc 5 from series 4 of Highlander


37. FAVORITE SMELLS?
Just after it rains when it's been hot for a while.
Sunflowers perfume

38. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP IN THE
MORNING?
Do I really have to this AGAIN

39. How old where you when you went on your first date?
15/16 MacD's and it set the level for the rest of my dates since, it didn't quite go as planned

40. What's your favorite sound?
Subjectively;
When squealing brakes doesn't end in a dry slap and a howl of pain?
Someone (anyone) saying 'I'll get this'?
Someone saying 'Yes'
Silence on sunday after the kids have gone back to their mums

WHAT IS YOUR FULL NAME?
Andrew Martin Gray

2. WHAT COLOR PANTS ARE YOU WEARING?
Deep blue jeans that probably need washing with black boxer shorts

3. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
Jeffrey Lewis - It's the ones that crack that the light shines through

4. WHAT ARE THE LAST 4 DIGITS OF YOUR PHONE NUMBER?
5650

5. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
Cheese sandwich on toasted bread

6. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
Browny green

7. HOW IS THE WEATHER RIGHT NOW?
Very cold & dull

8. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
My friend Sonza, asking her when we'd pick her up for the party tomorrow

9. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX?
Clothing, especially with comic slogans

10. FAVOURITE BOOK?
I know that whatever I'll say, I'll immediately think of something else. I might just go for Tom Sharpe - Wilt but don't take that as definite

11. HOW ARE YOU TODAY?
Now have internet access after almost two months without, so good!

12. FAVORITE DRINK NON ALCOHOLIC?
Apricot Schloer

13. FAVORITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK?
Any real ale named after misbehaving clergy or mythincal creatures (except Rampant Gryphon). Or mead

14. FAVORITE SPORTS?
CLimbing & sailing. Neither realy sports, but then

15. HAIR COLOR?
Browny black and not as stupidly long on the sides anymore

16. EYE COLOR?
Blue and blue

17. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
No, though I may want to wear some weird coloured ones somepoint

18. SIBLINGS AND THEIR AGES:
1 older sister, 26, in australia

19. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FOOD?
Pizza, Anything with mushrooms, Anything vegetarian doing its best to be an unhealthy meat food

20. TEMPER OR MILD MANNERED?
Very mild mannered, but used to be an utter loon

21. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
The Proposition - pretty good

22. FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR?
Summer solstice - June 21.

23. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT?
Me and current partner knew each other for 3 years before going out. Should tell you something

24. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS BETTER?
Happy endings, provided they're not too sickly

25. SUMMER OR WINTER?
I prefer spring, myself

26. HUGS OR KISSES?
Hugging, although I'm easy

27. RELATIONSHIPS OR ONE NIGHT STANDS?
Good relationships

28. CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA?
Chocolate

29. DO YOU WANT YOUR FRIENDS TO WRITE BACK?
Yeah, alright then

30. TEA, LIAGB or WOLP?
WOLP. It just has so many things going on

31. WHICH NEXTIAN CHARACTER IS MOST LIKE YOU?
Bowden, a bit too cautious for my own good

32. LIVING ARRANGEMENTS?
In house of three mates from university

33. WHAT BOOKS ARE YOU READING?
Just finished ninth life of Louis Drax, now in The Vesuvius Club by Mark Gatiss

34. WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
Nothing: It's a stealth mouse mat

35. FAVORITE BOARD GAME?
Articulate

36. WHAT DID YOU DO LAST NIGHT?
Played D&D, went to the pub, came home, watched Invasion

37. FAVORITE SMELLS?
Grass, the infamous "After rain" smell, and strangely, bacon cooking

38. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP IN THE
MORNING?
Hmmm, still tired

39. How old where you when you went on your first date?
21, depending on what counts as a date

40. What's your favorite sound?
Music that's good, or running streams on rocks



-------
Turn the silliness to eleven!

Martin says:

I give up, I'll tell. A bunch of people from the res went down to the Old Gaol (a backpackers/bed & breakfast/pub place). We were sitting in the courtyard on a long bench. At some point in the evening, I started holding the hand of the girl next to me. A couple days later, I asked if she'd like to go get coffee with me and she accepted.

Nothing sinister....

I must get photos up of where I am. In the meantime: [www.ru.ac.za]

Awwwwww, that's just so cute.

Our boy, all grown up. *wipes tear from eye*

I love "at some point in the evening I started holding her hand"... heavens, how did that happen? V nicely done, Martin.



_ _ _ _ _

If the English language made any sense, a catastrophe would be an apostrophe with fur.

Good work lad.


(Hands Kaz a tissue)

No wonder she accepted the coffee suggestion though, "after a couple of days" sitting there holding your hand, she was probably parched!

HAT IS YOUR FULL NAME?
I thought it was Ptolemy, but yes - "hat" is so much more convenient.

2. WHAT COLOR PANTS ARE YOU WEARING?
That's an extremely personal question, is it not? Black boxers from Austin Reed, if you must know.

3. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
I'm reviewing an album by Tungsten74, a pensive New York improvised rock band.

4. WHAT ARE THE LAST 4 DIGITS OF YOUR PHONE NUMBER?
6134

5. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
A scab off the back of my hand.

6. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
I'd have been melted down long ago.

7. HOW IS THE WEATHER RIGHT NOW?
Silly questioner - weather is not person! Assuming you mean "what is the weather like currently", it's raining. I like the rain. It's really quite romantic.

8. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
My best friend, Sinead Williamson

9. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX?
Her voice

10. FAVOURITE BOOK?
'The Abortion' by Richard Brautigan

11. HOW ARE YOU TODAY?
About ready to bite someone's head off

12. FAVOURITE DRINK NON ALCOHOLIC?
Tea. Lashings of it.

13. FAVORITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK?
Why does the spelling of "Favourite" keep changing? Gaaaah! Fine red wine.

14. FAVOURITE SPORTS?
Cricket (which is more of a pastime than a sport, I suppose)

15. HAIR COLOUR?
Light brown these days, used to be blonde.

16. EYE COLOR?
Green. The other one is as well, amazingly.

17. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
Contact lenses, you mean? Nope.

18. SIBLINGS AND THEIR AGES:
I have no brothers or sisters. When I was born, I was so ugly the midwife slapped my mother instead.

19. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE FOOD?
Cake.

20. TEMPER OR MILD MANNERED?
None of your damn business

21. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
Ha ha! "movie", what an old fashioned phrase that is! How long have moving pictures been around now?! Well over a hundred years! I think the last film I watched was 'Possession' (based on the book by A.S. Byatt)

22. FAVOURITE DAY OF THE YEAR?
Wednesday

23. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT?
God yes. My biggest fear is one of rejection.

24. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS BETTER?
Happy. Life's scary enough as it is without make-believe being scary as well.

25. SUMMER OR WINTER?
Spring

26. HUGS OR KISSES?
Hugs, dammit.

27. RELATIONSHIPS OR ONE NIGHT STANDS?
Relationships all the way; I have yet to ever experience a one night stand. And neither do I ever want one.

28. CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA?
Vanilla probably, but the question seems a little unfinished?

29. DO YOU WANT YOUR FRIENDS TO WRITE BACK?
No; it's fine. They can call me if they want to.

30. TEA, LIAGB or WOLP?
See (12)

31. WHICH NEXTIAN CHARACTER IS MOST LIKE YOU?
I've never spotted anyone remotely like me in the books.

32. LIVING ARRANGEMENTS?
I breathe in and out, take on board food and water, and sleep occasionally (but not often enough)

33. WHAT BOOKS ARE YOU READING?
'Prisoner's Dilemma' (a mathematical book by William Poundstone) and an anthology of prose by John Betjeman

34. WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
My mouse, oddly enough

35. FAVOURITE BOARD GAME?
Escalado

36. WHAT DID YOU DO LAST NIGHT?
Photoshopped and published an advert for an upcoming event I'm involved with

37. FAVOURITE SMELLS?
The woman I love.

38. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING?
This morning as it happens it was whether I could be arsed to post on this fforum again for the first time this year when there's people like Dave who openly despise me for no valid reason that they've ever bothered to explain and others like Puck who seem to think it's some kind of blog for incessantly airing teenage angst and self-obsessive nonsense and doesn't seem content until every last thread is terminated by some invariably irrelevant and starkly unoriginal comment, topped off by that bloody irritating and urrerly distracting and unamusing signature block.

39. How old where you when you went on your first date?
Late - 22 probably. I was an ugly duckling even then, and never set out to win any popularity contests in any case.

40. What's your favourite sound?
The initial crackle as a stylus falls into place and commences to play an LP record.

Welcome back Ptols. Feeling a touch angsty today?

I love you too, Ptolemy!



Post Edited (04-04-06 00:32)

-------------------------
Metaphors be with you!

Well, Puck may be trying to take this as a joke, but I am not, because I know you, Ptolemy, and I know you are vindictive enough to be completely serious. You've gone too far with those comments. If you don't like people here, rack off and avoid them, but don't come back just to be downright rude and nasty. Dave has posted comments about you for the comments YOU have posted about people he counts as friends. You, however, and as always, have gone the 'Poor Ptolemy, I don't know why he hates me' route, because you can't pull your head out of your arse long enough to see that you are a bitchy, nasty, hypocritical bastard who needs a good kicking. I know you are more than capable of blocking me from your website, since I have been on the end of your hypocritical tyrades before, and to be frank, I don't care any more. I don't want to be anywhere you are. You have to be one of the lowest forms of humanity I have ever had the displeasure of coming across.

I apologise to anyone offended by the language I have used here, I realise it's not in keeping with this being a family friendly forum, but I feel extremely stongely about this.

Phil, you're an arse.

Ode to Ptolemy

Ptolemy, Ptolemy!
There's no one like Ptolemy,
Of fforumites there's no one who I venerate more solemnly.
Like summer sun, his temp'rament,
Enlightening and heaven-sent,
Manifestly demonstrates pure gentleness and jollity.
Yes, truly he is gracious,
Irreproachable, and kind,
Since his virtues are capacious
And his foes of unsound mind.
Jealousy is surely
At the root of all this strife:
Compared to him we purely
Know we're losers with no life!
Are we cretins doomed to languish in our ignorance and bliss?
Shall our uncorrected follies lead the fforum world amiss?
Sound trumpets: Here's Ptolly to correct us (as he's never been remiss)!



-------------------------
Metaphors be with you!

Awwww, a birfday pome for our Ptolly. How sweet.